Is it wrong?

[Panagiota]

I am a female dark elf necromancer of the 62 season. Some time ago I grouped with this druid in a LDoN adventure. He was inept to put it lightly, he went AFK during he adventure to go eat dinner. He came back to the group just laying it in to him. Everyone insulted him except for myself. I felt sorry for him because I didnt think he realized how badly he messed up. So I told him not to take it to heart and to just do better next time. BIG mistake on my part. I now have a druid pet folks. He is allways sending me tells saying how sexy I am and how nice I am. So instead of me getting I offended I decided to start using him. You see he is in an uber guild on my server and he frequently goes on raids. He has brought me countless high level words and spells.

I dont talk dirty to him or anything....he just seems to be lonely and deprived and I have been using him. He is a woodelf druid and its been funny for a while but now I feel a little guilty, I mean what if he commits suicide or smething.

[Xavier]

Not saying what you did is right. But if he commits suicide over that, then it wouldnt matter if it was you. Or the freaking toothfairy, it was going to happen. My suggestion, talk to him about it and see what he says. And tread little. Or maybe just maybe, try being his friend.

[Antilight]

I agree with Xavier. You might want to go awhile without asking him for anything really important (if you need, for some reason, a port that wouldn't be bad). If you are simply using him to get stuff then I wouldn't condone that (which simply means I wouldn't do it).

It really sounds like you are a nice person to begin with. You didn't stomp on him when it would have been easy enough to join the gang and do so.

If you have gotten to the point where you don't like him saying you are sexy (I'm not sure in what context he is using this) then simply ask him to stop and see where that gets you.

Again, Xavier hit it on the nose. Try and be his friend and see what happens but if that doesn't seem to mesh or he gets more...weird...then ask him to stop. Talking will take you a long way and make you feel better (I hope).



Antilight

(and don't drink and drive, remember that) :D

[Rentz]

Being nice and polite is not the way of the necro. :angry:

But using him for words, spells, items...etc IS the way of the necro. Keep it up! :lol:

[Tumi]

Panagiota, give me his name. If he has Words of Torment or Words of Agony, I'll talk dirty to him ! B)

Tumi

[Fizzleplink]

I mean what if he commits suicide or smething.

I wonder if Voice Graft works with Wake the Dead.

My 2cp? Be polite, be friendly, be obsure, but be honest. Sounds like a good in-game friendship; druids make decent partners, usually.

[Ebonstar]

Some good advice already.

It's human nature to do things for people in order to get attention, approval and/or acceptance. We all do it to a greater or lesser extent, and in different ways, at different times and under different circumstances. But make no mistake, we all crave the approval of others sometimes.

But how much and how often and how intense is it ? The occasional twang of wishing someone liked you more than they do is different to devoting everything slavishly to approval-seeking and attention-seeking behaviour. If it seems to run the person, rather than the other way around, then it could be a problem.

If it's causing difficulties for you or he's crossing any lines you're not comfortable with, as people have already said, be polite, be courteous, but be firm and honest and ask him to stop. If it's not causing any problems, if he's happy to keep bringing you presents and you're happy to accept them, then I'd say don't worry. As long as it's not given with strings attached, you're probably fine.

If you're ever in doubt, nearly anything and everything in the world can be solved by honest communication :-)

Oh, and if someone else is going to commit suicide, you can be there for them, you can offer to help, but in the end, it's their decision and you cannot change that. There's also no need for you to take responsibility for them or feel guilty either. Be true to yourself and to others, noone can ask more of you than that.

[NeSikWay]

Well, I don't think you have done anything wrong, either way. You can't predict the response you get from any one individual online. if you keep it impersonal, then he has very little choice, if he make you unconfortable, then let him know. If he prings you stuff, tell him he should sell it and make some money for himself. Or make it an exchange that you will do combos for him. just keep it in game talk. Be friendly and be honest, let him know when you don't have time to chat. Cant really do much more than that in an online game.

[Panagiota]

Here's the thing I am not asking him to bring me stuff he just does. Like he brought me words of Torment and some items. I didnt turn it down. I dont like that he makes comments like calling me "babe" or "sexy" because he confesed to me that he was 15 and I REALLY dont want to be labeled a sex offender so last night I talked to him about that told him I was happily married and those comments were innappropriate. He said he doesnt mind gving me stuff because he considered me a friend for sticking up for him. Anyways, things seemed to have worked out, he still brings me stuff but in exchange he still tells me his problems in real life and I try my best to let him vent.

Its wierd, Im almost like his EQ bartender

Panagiota

[Antilight]

Glad to hear it worked itself out, Pana. Sounds like you could end up friends if that whole age thing doesn't bother you (and why should it).

Also, folks take a chance whenever they go out on a limb with Avatars. You could just have easily have been a male behind that female avatar (yes, I've heard of guys who do that specifically to get stuff).

Again, good to hear you both are communicating.



Antilight :ph34r:

[Jebasiz]

LOL...I'm glad it worked out. That said this wouldn't be NEARLY as funny if it didn't involve a druid.

Jeb

[Panagiota]

he's my little puppy dog.....I throw him a bone and he brings me back a whole cow

[HazardousPanic]

Originally posted by Panagiota@Jan 13 2004, 04:09 PM
I am a female dark elf necromancer of the 62 season. Some time ago I grouped with this druid in a LDoN adventure. He was inept to put it lightly, he went AFK during he adventure to go eat dinner.
Did he say - "Pizza's here!" and go AFK!!

If youso worried just slash ignore.

[Xarulsis Soulreaver]

There's just somthing about those dark elf necros...

[Death's Servent]

Originally posted by Xarulsis Soulreaver@Jan 15 2004, 01:26 AM
There's just somthing about those dark elf necros...
Yeap there is lol. And the comment on males playing female chars. I have seen it go both ways.


Anyway, everyone needs someone to talk to at times. It is the way that we humans are.

[Slitherclaw]

Just a shame I don't get that same response with my male Iksar...*sigh* so unfair.
Although I do seem to have a female halfling following..go figure.

Slitherclaw

51 Iksar Necromancer

[Doomfir]

I tell ya.. us DE's got the babes. lol!

[Kompressor]

[B] heh, a lot of younger players are impressionable in game. If someone had done something nice for them or "had their back" it goes a long way.. I have a few peeps like that who i ve helped lvld, and twink.. spotting them 10-20 k for items doesnt bother me none, most of the time it ends up helping me in the long run coz I know they're gonna hvae my back. But you can nevre have enough friends in EQ, more the merrier in those times of need-)

[Minael]

eq can be a small community, but can be a big world of different to ech person, being put dow in a plce where you have little or no real interaction, but still in it for friends and community and how big the wolrd is in the perpective of one, it can be really hurtful to be put down, and feel there is a huge part that dislikes you, maybe he is not an exper and wishes to be friends, how that mixes with people trying to advance is tricky, eq can be social but for the most part expansions and game content pushes people away from direct socializing and just nonstop advancement, it can be tough, and when someone sick s up for you, it can almost be the only thing you needed at the moment, and it does create an instant bond, and feels like the person sticking up for you is your protector and you could feel you want to pay back, you cant pay back with money or items he knows that but it is the act of giving that really makes him push foward in life to repay and find what he enjoys in life. If you had not stuck up for him he would not have talked to you or would have completely hid himself away from the world, just accept his stuff but make it known its not neccesary, just be friendly and try and see if hell group with oyu and tell him where he can hunt, even giving him advice that he can still be needed and have fun in game is all that matters, this may make no sense and just not be pertinent to the matter, but imo it is harmless, unless he is a very hateful person he might decide to give and then just off himself, but I did not see any sign of suicide, or dont really know maybe you see it deeper than i and feel he is a desperado, but people that just giveout of feeling of repaying and debt dont tend to off themselves they just stick around and hop on the next chance to rise up n their own.

=)

yer a nice person, wish i was on yer server, but lots of nice people on povar, so its all good. i think yer sexy too tho. =)